Worrying will never change the outcome, but being prepared for the outcome would help. Let’s figure out how to stop worrying and start living with a scientific approach.
It’s like comparing worrying to a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but doesn’t take you anywhere.
By the end of this blog:
You will be familiar with what makes you anxious. Moreover, you will be ready on how to stop worrying and start living. You will learn to live in overwhelming and fleeting bliss.
Before getting into the actual discussion, let’s go through a few questions.
- Are you too afraid of being on stage like some of my friends are?
- Are you too afraid of trying something new during this lockdown only because you fear what others might think about you? (it can be as simple as doing a workout, meditation, starting your page opening a small online business, learning a new language, or taking singing, dancing as a passion).
If your answer was no then it brings me to keypoint number one on how to stop worrying and start living.
True power lies within ourselves
That text that tenses your shoulders. That jab from a co-worker. The stranger who cut you off, the comments from your aunt about your outfit, criticism from someone who doesn’t understand your art. That’s theirs to carry. It’s only yours once you decide it requires something that was never your responsibility: a response.
Moreover, the stuck feeling, the out of control feeling comes from being unconscious. From being a slave to quick ego responses that bring us back to familiar cycles of emotions we’ve become hooked into re-living again + again.
Not everything deserves a response.
True power is knowing that not everything requires a response. Above all, not everything requires your attention or awareness. Healing is becoming conscious plus becoming aware of what you choose.
True power is and has always been found internally. Within ourselves. Within how we answer the planet around us. How we assign meaning to events. How we choose to engage.
What if Adin I fail?
It means you are f*ckwithable again…But what I did now?
You are giving a fuck about failure. We love people’s acceptance more, our convenience more rather than trying out something new and being rejected.
Because you are hardwired by society to be always comfortable and if you try something new which makes people make uncomfortable, then aha, you have enough people mocking you down.
What we need to learn to be Unf*ckwithable is to accept and give rejection on the face.
Ok, how do I do that?
Simply learn to accept and say no. #second key on how to stop worrying and start living
It will make your life better
Firstly, no is entirely great when you realize how to utilize it well. You state no to doing a lot of futile poop that you don’t believe is significant throughout everyday life. Secondly, you disapprove of individuals who violate their limits and set out of line expectations of your time or consideration. Thirdly, you disapprove to clarify where you stand and what you will / will not endure in your connections. No is amazing.
Saying these nos is difficult, of course. After all, the ability to say healthy no requires a certain degree of self-respect and care. But saying no to people and things that harm your life rather than help is often the first step to learning how to love and care for yourself.
Learn to mind your own business. #third key to stopping worrying and start living
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A lady probably (the mid-’60s) stays 2 floors below me. Whenever I see her, she is during a fight with someone or the opposite. I can back that the fight reasons aren’t big they’re always petty. Oh, you may wonder, why doesn’t she mind her own business? Why is she poking her nose in neighbor problems? Why is she not pleased with the people around her.
So what can we conclude from this story?
Most people who give a fuck about whatever you do, who at an opportune time try to drag you down, have nothing meaningful in their life to give a real fuck about. Tweet
Believe in yourself when no one does. #fourth key to stop worrying and start living.
‘Once you believe in yourself it doesn’t really matter what other people think’. That’s what makes you a winner. So f*ck unimportant things in life.’
‘Quit worrying about what people think, always follow your heart.’
Because in the end, what you think about yourself matters.Tweet
Our true power is not in the external. Though, we’ve been conditioned to believe that’s where it comes from.
Firstly, we are told power comes through a job, what we own, or how people perceive us. That’s why so many of us have ‘social anxiety‘ disorder. Secondly, when this ego perception of power shifts, so will our self-worth.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what it is to be loved. Above all, its work. It’s hard work. It’s easy when it’s easy + it’s harder when the “little child” inside us feels slighted. Not only when the inner child feels Unseen + unheard but also scared + defensive.
Moreover, in those moments when we have the greatest opportunity to show up as the wise self who knows that humans project their inner wounds outwards + no response is a misunderstood form of love.
Stop taking things personally. #fifth key to stopping worrying
Self-observation is a superpower. When you practice observing yourself, you’ll see how much you project your “stuff” onto others. Our own life experiences, beliefs, ideas come out all day long into those around us.
The inner world reflects outwards.
If we aren’t aware of the ego, it will take us on an emotional roller coaster all day long. For instance, that person who told us we look tired, the woman who ran over our food with her shopping cart because she was distracted (lost in her thoughts). Rude right?
Haha, the ego creates villains + makes us look like the victim. The ego gains a false sense of importance through the belief that people purposely target us with all of their behaviors.
Human beings are mostly unconscious. Mostly distracted in their mind. They repeat things they have been told without being aware of how it will impact another person.
Practice self-awareness. #sixth key to stop worrying
When we practice self awareness, we get the following advantages.
- We can navigate the world with grace.
- One can see other people’s behavior for what it is: a reflection of how they feel about themselves.
- We can choose a response in alignment with the highest self, not the knee jerk ego reaction.
Consciousness heals. As we awaken, as we know ourselves better off, we can process our feelings around people’s behavior more effectively. Without letting it take us on an emotional roller coaster. And, we can choose to have boundaries around behavior that’s hurtful or harmful to our emotional wellness.
Just because it isn’t about us, doesn’t mean it’s ours to carry. Or, our ours to fix.
Thank you for reading
If you liked the post, share it with other people as they can benefit as well.
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